Devastatin' Dave The Turntable Slave

This guy is stealing my thunder.  Sunglasses. Check.  Bike gloves. Check.  Skinny belt.  Check.  Clever rhyming title.   He's got it all.

Farewell To My Dieffenbachia

This may be the day the dieffenbachia died.  At least it is the day it will be retired.  The hardy dieffenbachia was a redwood of a plant, surviving pestilence, and menacing children, and unfriendly relocations.  It survived twenty years in three living rooms.  It survived short jaunts on the highway, and then recovered from an unfriendly sunburn  acquired when my floors were being redone.  It held up against my sword-wielding nephew, shedding leaves but maintaining strong roots.   It lived even as it outgrow its pot, being tied and staked and tied again, its trunks scoliosis-like, too long, and bearing fewer and fewer leaves.  It survived several bouts with nematodes, and all the times I forgot to water.   This was a beast amongst houseplants.  The dieffenbachia stayed with me through thick and thin.  And now I must let it go.

A few years ago I took underexposed photos of this plant for my mountain biking blog.  The dark dieffenbachia served as substitute for the nighttime foliage I encountered when riding my bike.  You may see the photos here.  http://mountainbikeoc.blogspot.com/2009/02/night-riding.html  The photos are unremarkable, but they seem appropriate for this dark day.  Soon my dieffenbachia will be traveling to the dark underbelly of the green waste can, and then, hopefully, back to the earth.

We're So Lucky To Have You

I love holiday cards from businesses and corporations.  Who doesn't?  It's great to here Happy Birthday or Happy Anniversary from the bank.  I almost don't mind that they want to add a fee to my checking account. And well wishes from the electric and gas utilities?  It gets me through the month, running the lights, the jacuzzi, hell, I'm thinking about putting in that extra refrigerator.

This week I received a St. Patrick's day email from my home insurance carrier.  Everyone needs the luck of the Irish to stave off fires and acts of God (not earthquakes though, that would be a different policy!).  The title of the insurers E-card was: We're So Lucky To Have You!  Well, apparently they are so lucky to have me that they decided not to renew my policy.  And why, you might ask, would they not renew the policy of an upstanding citizen like myself.  It's because I have too much debris in front of my house.  When I first heard this I thought about my deck and the banana tree adjoining my house. My outside collection: a bit of deck furniture, two plants and my bicycle.  I didn't think this was too much debris.  So I waited for the inspection report.  Guess what?  They did the inspection while I was moving in.  Yup.  In the inspection photos, my beds, my dresser and my sofa are all stacked up next to the front door.   The report goes on to mention that I live near a slope.  Yes a slope.  My whole neighborhood is on a slope.  Nearly my whole city is on a slope.  It's called Laguna Beach and, yes, we like to celebrate St. Patrick's Day sitting on the sofa that blocks our front door.