We're So Lucky To Have You

I love holiday cards from businesses and corporations.  Who doesn't?  It's great to here Happy Birthday or Happy Anniversary from the bank.  I almost don't mind that they want to add a fee to my checking account. And well wishes from the electric and gas utilities?  It gets me through the month, running the lights, the jacuzzi, hell, I'm thinking about putting in that extra refrigerator.

This week I received a St. Patrick's day email from my home insurance carrier.  Everyone needs the luck of the Irish to stave off fires and acts of God (not earthquakes though, that would be a different policy!).  The title of the insurers E-card was: We're So Lucky To Have You!  Well, apparently they are so lucky to have me that they decided not to renew my policy.  And why, you might ask, would they not renew the policy of an upstanding citizen like myself.  It's because I have too much debris in front of my house.  When I first heard this I thought about my deck and the banana tree adjoining my house. My outside collection: a bit of deck furniture, two plants and my bicycle.  I didn't think this was too much debris.  So I waited for the inspection report.  Guess what?  They did the inspection while I was moving in.  Yup.  In the inspection photos, my beds, my dresser and my sofa are all stacked up next to the front door.   The report goes on to mention that I live near a slope.  Yes a slope.  My whole neighborhood is on a slope.  Nearly my whole city is on a slope.  It's called Laguna Beach and, yes, we like to celebrate St. Patrick's Day sitting on the sofa that blocks our front door.